How to get your ex boyfriend back

How to get your ex boyfriend back

What to do to get your ex boyfriend back

You’ve recently ended a relationship.  You miss the old times and you want your ex boyfriend back.  However, he seems to have moved on and you’re not sure what you can do.  You’ve come to the internet for answers and solutions.  Regardless of your situation, his article will show you what can be done to possibly get back your ex boyfriend.

Reflect on the situation.

Do you really want your ex back?  Think about the situation you’re in and decide whether your head is in the right place while making this decision.  If it is shortly after the breakup, trying to get back might come off as desperate.

You need to reflect on how things ended.  Who ended the relationship? Why was the relationship ended?

How did your relationship end?

If you ended the relationship unexpectedly and you’ve changed your mind, it might be time for you to communicate that to your ex boyfriend.  There’s a chance he misses you back.  Explain that you made a mistake by ending things.  However, this article will focus on what to do if you were broken up with.

If your ex was the one to end the relationship, he might need time and distance right now.  Reflect on the reasons why things ended.  Was it distance? Did he find someone else?  Regardless of the situation consider whether it has changed at all since things ended.  If their reason is valid, and nothing has changed, then it is a good indicator to not try ad get him back right now.

ex boyfriend back
It is important to reflect on your situation

It’s not you, it’s me.

If your ex boyfriend tells you he is breaking up with you for personal reasons, hear him out.  He is going through interpersonal problems and is not in a state to maintain a relationship.  Perhaps he wants to focus more on his education.  Perhaps he is too busy and doesn’t think he can give you the attention you deserve.

Ultimately, these reasons can be legitimate.  To get him back you would have to make him realize that you would not interfere with his plans.  For example, if he breaks up with you because he wants to focus more on his studies, then he sees you as a distraction.  If you think his interpretation is wrong, and you’re actually not a distraction, then show him.  Make it evident to him that you’re also academically driven and would align him with his goals.  Do not try to get your ex boyfriend back if it requires you to change.  Do not lie about your interests and values just to get your ex boyfriend back.

It’s not me, it’s you.

It is very heartbreaking to hear that you are the reason an ex boyfriend broke up with you.  This requires a lot of reflecting and it can be difficult to get your ex boyfriend back.  Usually, people hide the real reasons they break up with you.  However, let’s pretend your ex boyfriend was very explicit on his reasons.  Maybe he doesn’t like the way you treat his friends.  Perhaps he thinks you are too clingy.  Or maybe he feels like you are too different and don’t have common interests.  Whatever the reason is, do not run back to him saying you can change.  Change does not come quickly.  You might feel inclined to say anything to get your ex boyfriend back.  The truth is, you’ll just be pretending if you tell him you’ll change.

If you have different interests, you’ll be miserable pretending to care about the same video games or movies as him.  This is why it is really important to not make any rash decisions.  Think about your situation before acting.  Perhaps there is a lot of truth to his reasons for breaking up with you and you should respect that.

Take some time before trying to get your ex boyfriend back

Sometimes time is all you need.  We all get caught up in the heat of the moment.  In reality, time allows us to think more clearly.  If you are struggling with the breakup, consider reading our blog post on how to get over a breakup.  I’ve had several friends do crazy things after a breakup, which they later regretted.  I’ve had some tell me their plans regarding property damage.  Luckily, I have been able to talk them out of it.  Burning his clothes, or breaking a window in his car will not help things and will likely get you some criminal charges.

Do not change for your ex boyfriend, change for the better

Breakups can be a great source of inspiration.  I know many people who have gotten into fitness after a breakup.  It does not mean there was anything wrong with them personally.  They’ve just taken the situation as a source of inspiration to make some changes in their lifestyle that made them a better person.  They did not do this in an effort to become more attractive to get their ex boyfriend back.  They did this because they were unhappy with their current selves and wanted a change.

I want to be very clear that a breakup does not mean there is anything wrong or broken with you.  You do not need to make changes to yourself to make anyone happier.  However, if you feel like it would make you happy and align your lifestyle better with your goals, then by all means, go ahead and make those changes.  People are attracted to people with passions and dreams, and those who are working towards them.  Instead of focusing on the short term problem of not being able to get your ex boyfriend back, focus on your long term goals.  Passions, confidence, and hard work  will often lead to long term happiness.  Chances are, you will be introduced to new people, and “upgrade” from your previous relationship.

 

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